Hell's Kitchen Power Rankings - Season 9

EDIT: Just as Will revealed he's in the top 2, Elizabeth revealed she's in the top 6. Check out her Facebook pic (she's wearing a black jacket..only rewarded to the top 6): https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=574425724. Same goes for Paul (no shocker there): https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=42417971.

I don't care what anyone says, Hell's Kitchen is one of the better hows on television right now. Yes it's trashy reality TV and yes I know Breaking Bad is on television, but nothing puts a smile more on my face than hearing Chef Ramsey yell at people. Season 9 isn't one of the better seasons mainly because there aren't people like Aaron (RIP) and Raj, but this season still has plenty of good moments. There are 9 remaining chefs left and I've listed their rankings in reverse order in terms of overall performance up to this point.

9. Tommy: Tommy should have been kicked off earlier, but he has remained on the show because of some fluke good performances here and there. Jonathan is a better cook and leader than Tommy, but because Jonathan is overly emotional his time on the show ended sooner. Tommy isn't vocal, has trouble more than half of the time in the kitchen, and is annoying as fuck (this won't get him kicked off, but makes me want him off the show more). If the blue team loses he'll be off next and even if they don't lose Ramsey might give him the boot.

8. Carrie: I'd much rather see her go far on the show then Elise, but in reality Carrie is much more likely to go home earlier. Her horrible performance in the beginning has put her at an unfair disadvantage, but she's not a strong cook. She can cook well, but under pressure she fucks up pretty regularly.

7. Elizabeth: A shitty spot to be in because it means you're the last one voted off right before the black jackets come out. Elizabeth has been somewhat under the radar and once Carrie (the last of the mediocre chefs) gets voted off she'll become the weakest link. She's not a bad cook, but hasn't really done anything to impress Chef Ramsey and she has huge communication issues which will be her downfall.

6. Natalie: I originally had her going far, but lately she's been struggling (especially on her last 3 services). I expect her to bounce back the next couple of services, but if she screws up once or twice more (which is more of capable of doing) it's goodbye to Natalie.

5. Elise: Can't stand her, but there's no denying that she can actually cook and deserves to still be in the game. Her attitude sucks, but she has proven herself to have the ability to handle the pressure of Hell's Kitchen. I think her attitude will ultimately send her home; either by saying something wrong to Chef Ramsey or the other Chefs getting even further disgruntled with her that they sabotage her. I won't be surprised if she makes it to the top 3 or 4, but no way she's making it to the finals.

4. Paul: A great cook ,but has demonstrated weakness. He was around 2 or 3 about 2 weeks ago until he screwed up terribly on the fish station and wasn't able to recover. Everyone's allowed to make mistakes, but the competition ahead of him is too strong in my opinion for Paul to advance to the finals.

3. Jamie: Jamie is definitely the type of chef that Ramsey's looking for. A good chef and vocal, but also extremely respectful to Ramsey. She could be a finalist.

2. Jennifer: Since a few weeks ago, I've had Jennifer pegged as this year's Nona (weight jokes aside). She's been flying under the radar until the last episode when the red team selected her as "their leader" (which only helps her cause), but hasn't really screwed up much yet and has demonstrated her ability to communicate.

1. Will: Will is easily the strongest Chef in Hell's Kitchen. Minus the last episode when Wolfgang Puck hated his spaghetti he's been PERFECT which no other Chef has been this season. The only issue with Will is that the "obvious" choice for a winner tends to come in second, for whatever reason (think Russell in Season 8 and Kevin in Season 6). The only advantage that Will has over these two is, while still a little cocky, isn't nearly as much of a douche as Russell and Kevin. Plus, if you look at his interview on the Hell's Kitchen site you know he's in the top 2 based on his answers (saying that his biggest accomplishment would be to win the head chef position at BLT Steak even though these interviews were conducted after their appearance on the show).

Child Stars - Where Are They Now

It's funny how a person can be the biggest thing in Hollywood than absolutely fall off the face of the Earth a couple of years later.  It seems that childhood actors, compared to adult / teenage actors, are more typecast making it difficult to find a job later on in life. Don't get me wrong, there are many childhood actors who went on to do great things such as Drew Barrymore and Leonardo Dicaprio, but these people seem to be the exception to the rule. For this post, I've decided to focus on 10 popular childhood stars (or at least popular in my eyes) who seemingly fell off the face of the Earth and take a look at where they are now.

Who? Andrea Barber
Best Known For: Kimmy Gibbler on Full House.
Then and Now Pics:
 

What are they up to?  If anyone was going to end up being a meth addict (Jodie Sweetin) or porn star (Judy from Family Matters) you would think it would be the one who got the shit end of the stick on these shows. Well, Andrea Barber, best known as Kimmy from Full House, is neither and is doing great! Well, maybe not great, but she's doing okay. She has decided to retire from acting after Full House and move to the UK with her husband where she had two children. Now, she lives in So. Cal with her family and doesn't seem to be doing much of anything these days (this made for an EXCITING first "Where Are They Now" update...). At least the one we expected to be fucked up in the head is the most normal.


Who? Jaleel White
Best Known For: Steve Urkel from Family Matters:
Then and Now Pics:

What are they up to? The nerdy Urkel (and to a lesser extent, the studly Stephan) has grown up and is no longer playing neglected nerdy teenagers who have an unhealthy obsession with cheese and average looking next door neighbors. Believe it or not, he's still acting and acting fairly regularly. The reason why you might not have seen him is that most of his roles are very minor (i.e. appearing in a TV show here and there). Jaleel seems to be forever stuck in these one off roles (with the exception of a few very unknown short films and series).


Who? Dustin Diamond
Best Known For: Screech on Saved by the Bell
Then and Now Pics:














What are they up to? Screech was one of the biggest nerds of the 90s (with the exception of the aforementioned Urkel) but managed to be friends with the "cool group" at Saved by the Bell. What gives? Anyway, Dustin Diamond is now..well..kind of a douche bag. If you watched Celebrity Fit Club (and who hasn't) he was on it in 2007 and was the least liked person on the show by far. Never tried, always had an attitude, etc.  Besides this appearance, Dustin Diamond has been starring in Oscar worthy roles such as playing "Man in Outhouse" in the riveting "Big Money Rustlas" in 2010. He also had one of the least known roles in the 2009 unknown American Pie flick "American Pie Presents: The Book of Love" as "alumnus guy #1". His career is treading on thin ice, but he's still acting.  I also found this fact from IMDB pretty telling "Trying to sell 30,000 T-shirts at $15-$20 each, by the end of June 2006, in order to save his $250,000 Wisconsin home, that he purchased on contract". I'm sure most of you also heard that he filmed an amateur porn of himself.


Who? Danny Tamberelli
Best Known For: Little Pete on Pete and Pete
Then and Now Pics:



What are they up to? The Adventures of Pete and Pete was not only one of the weirdest Nickelodeon shows of all time, but one of the best. I always found it odd that nobody forced Little Pete to remove his tattoo considering he was in elementary school. I guess they had more things to worry about like a creepy pedophile named Artie who pretended to be a super hero. If you watched Nickelodeon post Pete and Pete you already know that Danny Tamberelli was on All That and Figure Out quite regularly. Besides doing nothing, he's now a bassist and vocalist for the rock band Jounce that is so well known that they don't have a Wikipedia page.


Who? Danny Lloyd
Best Known For: Danny (the little kid) in The Shining
Then and Now Pics:



What are they up to? The Shining is my favorite movie of all time so figured it would be appropriate to do it for Danny Lloyd. Danny Lloyd appeared in only one other role after The Shining in a made for TV movie. He is now a teacher of sciences in Missouri which many students will attest to being "just as scary as The Shining". It's actually quite surprising he wasn't in anything else considering how great his performance was.


Who? Tia Mowry
Best Known For: Tia in the show "Sister, Sister"
Then and Now Pics:


Where are they now? Since obviously no one gives a shit about Tamara Mowry, we will just focus on Tia. Tia Mowry is best known for her brilliant role as a chameleon witch thingy in an episode of Are You Afraid of the Dark and secondary as the star of Sister Sister. She was in the move "The Hot Chicks" back in 2002 and most recently produced and starred in a movie in 2010 called Double Wedding (it's a Lifetime movie so I"m sure it sucked) and is in the TV show "The Game" (which should be, but is not about 50 cent).


Who? Danielle Fishel
Best Known For: Topanga on Boy Meets World
Then and Now Pics:


Where are they now? Besides discovering the existence of donuts and then discovering that you can vomit them up after eating to lose weight, Danielle Fishel is still acting with recent roles as a TV host for the show "The Dish" and appearances on the show Parenthood.  She was quoted as saying "I don't smoke, I don't drink, I don't do drugs, I shop okay?" and then proceeded to get arrested for drunk driving in 2007. She also claimed actor Devon Sawa abused her during their relationship. While she didn't flat out say it, she said an "actor who she dated for almost 10 years physically abused her"..which can only be Devon Sawa. She also dated the now gay Lance Bass and the soon to be gay Ben Savage.


Who? Harvey Stephens
Best Known For: Damien in the 1976 flick "The Omen"
Then and Now Pic:



What are they up to? The Omen was one of the scariest movies of the 1970s which means that if it were to be shown in theaters today it would be compared to Big Momma's House for its horrorness (although Martin Lawrence in a fat suit is kind of scary). These days, Harvey isn't acting and is instead focusing on his career of staying employed. He was a futures trader in the London stock market and now a property developer in Kent, England.


Who? Jason Zimbler
Best Known For: Ferguson in Clarissa Explains it All
Then and Now Pics:


Where are they now? Everyone's 7th favorite fire crotch is obviously none other than Ferg face from Clarissa Explains it all. He was annoying, lacked a soul, and had more freckles than..a person with a lot of freckles. Since 2007, Jason Zimbler has founded and been directing shows from The Re-Theatre Instrument in Portland. This was pretty obvious once I saw a pic of his "look at me I'm all artsy" hat as shown below.



Who? Ross Hull
Best Known For: Gary (founder of the midnight society) from Are You Afraid of the Dark
Then and Now Pics:
 

Where are they now? Where were the adults on this show? Honestly, what parents allow their kids to gather in the woods at midnight (and if they didn't know, how could they never tell that they were gone). Gary was the leader of the Midnight Society, a group of socially awkward kids who told surprisingly scary stories around a campfire. Ross has held various weather anchor jobs in Canada with his most recent one being the weather anchor for CTV Southwestern Ontario as of last month. Apparently if you do a Google search for "Ross Hull" the first suggested search phrase is "Ross Hull gay" so we're officially saying he is now gay. According to a Livejournal comment by user Jeph21 (which is the most credible source out there), and I quote "I used to see Ross Hull in gay clubs all the time when I was in school (3 or 4 years ago), he was the creepy old man perving on college guys from the corner". And there you have it.

Ten Celebrities Who Lost Their Lives to Substance Abuse and Addiction

Celebrities gain access to some of the world’s most exclusive parties and often earn more money than they know what to do with. Unfortunately, the fast-paced high-life can catch up to a celebrity at a moment’s notice, where not even all of the fame and fortune in the world could save them from the fatal effects of substance abuse. The following ten entertainment icons all lost their lives to the consequences of substance abuse.

1. DJ AM – Adam “DJ AM” Goldstein died of an accidental overdose on August 28, 2009 in his New York apartment. Goldstein’s autopsy revealed acute intoxication as the cause of his death due to the combined effects of cocaine, oxycodone, Vicodin, Ativan, Klonopin, Xanax, Benadryl and Levamisole. Further reports revealing the presence of nine undigested Oxycontin pills in DJ AM’s system point to suicide as a possible cause of his death.

2. Heath Ledger – Pronounced dead at 3:36 p.m. in his fourth-floor Manhattan apartment on January 22, 2008, actor Heath Ledger lost his life accidentally to acute intoxication from the combined effects of prescription medications including OxyContin, hydrocodone, diazepam, temazepam, alprazolam and doxylamine.

3. Kurt Cobain – An electrician who entered Kurt Cobain’s Lake Washington home on April 8, 1994 discovered the musician’s lifeless body along with a shotgun and a suicide note. Although he died of a gunshot wound, an autopsy administered to the deceased American songwriter later revealed a high concentration of heroin and traces of Valium in his body, a combination sources believe may have contributed to his mood and behavior that led to his suicide.

4. Chris Farley – On December 18, 1997, Chris Farley’s brother found the American comedian and actor dead in his apartment. An autopsy later revealed that Chris Farley had died of a heart attack, overdosing on a combination of cocaine and morphine early that morning.

5. Judy Garland – American actress and singer Judy Garland died from an overdose of barbiturates in the bathroom of her rented house in Chelsea, London. The ten 1.5-grain Seconal capsules found in Garland’s bloodstream created speculation that her overdose was a suicide, but the lack of inflammation and drug residue in her stomach indicated that she took the drugs over a long period. Judy’s death certificate states that her death had been “accidental.”

6. Jimi Hendrix – Although the death of American guitarist, singer and songwriter Jimi Hendrix has never been fully explained (reports are unclear as to whether his death was a suicide or an accident), an autopsy revealed the presence of nine prescribed Vesperax sleeping pills in Hendrix’s stomach at the time of his death on September 18, 1970.

7. Michael Jackson – Initial reports claimed that painkillers played a role in pop legend Michael Jackson’s death, which occurred at the Ronald Reagan UCLA Medical Center on June 25, 2009. However, later reports pointed to additional medications that may have contributed to his death, including the anesthetic Diprivan and medication Jackson had taken for insomnia.

8. Marilyn Monroe – Found dead in the bedroom of her Los Angeles home on August 5, 1962, American actress, singer and model Marilyn Monroe lost her life to acute barbiturate poisoning. Initially listed as a “probable suicide” and later thought to have been a murder, Monroe’s death is one of the most debated conspiracy theories of the twentieth and twenty-first centuries.

9. Anna Nicole Smith –American model, sex symbol, actress and TV personality Anna Nicole Smith died of combined drug intoxication on February 8, 2007. Smith’s autopsy revealed the presence of Chloral hydrate in her system, the major component that doctors believe caused her death. The sedative became increasingly lethal when combined with the other prescription drugs in her system including four benzodiazepines, Klonopin, Ativan, Serax and Valium, as well as Benadryl and Topamax.

10. John Belushi – Comedian, actor and musician John Adam Belushi, most notably recognized for his work on Saturday Night Live and for his roles in movies National Lampoon’s Animal House and The Blues Brothers, died on March 5, 1982 from a combined injection of cocaine and heroin, a shot known in the drug world as a “speedball.”

Top Eight Hanna-Barbera Cartoon Characters

Starting in the early 1960s and up until the syndication of weekday afternoon cartoons in the mid-1980s, American animation studio Hanna-Barbera Productions, Inc. dominated the highly popular Saturday morning cartoon category. Along with the creation of numerous successful cartoon shows came fortune and fame for animation directors William Hanna and Joseph Barbera, who created an entourage of cartoon characters that would pave the way for decades of animated entertainment. Below are the top eight cartoon characters ever created by the Hanna-Barbera Enterprise.

1. Fred Flintstone – Fred Flintstone is the blue-collared brontosaurus-crane operator from Bedrock who coined the catchphrase “Yabba-Dabba-Doo!” The loud-mouthed and aggressive Flintstone spends most of his time and efforts scheming up ways to improve the working class lot of his family, which consists of his wife Wilma and daughter Pebbles. Despite his appearance, Fred Flintstone is a highly skilled athlete who excels in sporting events such as bowling, golfing, football and pool. He even went to the extent of taking ballet lessons to improve his bowling skills where he adopted the nickname “Twinkletoes”, a name that stuck with him throughout his college football years.

2. George Jetson – 38-year-old George Jetson lives with wife Jane, teenage daughter Judy and 7-year-old Elroy in the fictional and futuristic Orbit City, where all of the buildings are set on giant poles, much like the Space Needle in Seattle, Washington. Formerly the star pitcher for the Orbit High School Spaceball team, Jetson is a digital index operator who works at Spacely’s Space Sprockets, a manufacturer of “sprockets” and other high tech equipment. Jetson often complains about his heavy workload, which requires him to push a single button on a computer for one hour, one day a week, and frequently loses his job at the whim of his short-tempered boss, Cosmo G. Spacely. Despite losing his job repeatedly, Jetson always regains his position by the end of the episode once Spacely has cooled off and come to his senses.

3. Papa Smurf – After Grandpa and Nanny Smurf, Papa Smurf is the third oldest of the Smurfs, and has lived for an unprecedented 542 years. It is easy to recognize the gentle, wise and knowledgeable Papa Smurf, who stands out from the remainder of the 100-year-old Smurfs complements of his red attire and bushy white beard, which was once brown during his younger years. Serving as the leader and paternal figure of the Smurfs, the naturally altruistic Papa Smurf is always looking to lend a helping hand, and is constantly concerned with the harmony and well-being of the Smurf community. In his leisure time, Papa Smurf enjoys experimenting with magical chemistry, or alchemy, and his greatest hobby is creating elixirs that he uses to help fellow Smurfs who have gotten themselves into trouble.

4. Yogi Bear – In 1958, Yogi Bear made his television debut as a supporting character to Huck in The Huckleberry Hound Show. Three years later, in 1961, Hanna-Barbera Productions gave Yogi his own self-titled show, The Yogi Bear Show, which eventually became more popular than The Huckleberry Hound Show. Yogi was the first break-out character ever created by Hanna-Barbera Studios, but more significantly, he was one of the first of several characters created with a collar. The collar allowed his body to remain static so that only his head would need to be drawn in each frame while speaking, drastically reducing the number of drawings needed to create the cartoon. In fact, artists could now create a seven-minute cartoon, which usually requires 14,000 drawings, using only 2,000.

5. Scoobert “Scooby” Doo – Best friend and pet of Norville “Shaggy” Rogers, Scooby-Doo is the unique, seven-year-old (or forty-nine in dog years) Great Dane who gets scared just as easily as his master. Despite being terrified of what is lurking around the corner, close friends Velma, Daphne and Fred encourage Scooby to go after dangerous villains with enticing and irresistible “Scooby Snacks.” Unlike the other dogs in his reality, Scooby is able to speak, but only in broken English where he tends to pronounce words as if they started with an “R”. Scooby reveals this error in pronunciation at the end of the episode when he howls out his catch phrase, “Scooby-Dooby-Doo!” only it tends to sound more like “Rooby-Rooby-Roo!”

6. Huckleberry Hound – Despite having a name that is synonymous with being “average”, Huckleberry Hound is the blue dog who always seems to come out on top. Either through his slow and persistent style of tackling assignments, or just out of sheer luck, “Huck” has the remarkable ability to successfully complete his jobs, even in the face of backfiring results. Huckleberry Hound has taken on roles in numerous fields, including serving as a police officer and working as a dogcatcher, where he never fails to accomplish his goals with a relaxed, sweet and well-intentioned approach.

7. Tom Cat – Thomas “Tom” Cat is the blue and grey anthropomorphic cat who makes up 50% of the academy-award winning cat-and-mouse duo known to the world as Tom & Jerry. Since his first appearance in the 1940 animated short Puss Gets the Boot, Tom Cat has chased and competed with Jerry Mouse episode after episode, but rarely sets out to eat him despite the natural laws that define the food chain among the creatures of the animal kingdom. Tom spends most of his time setting traps for Jerry, but many of them backfire and end up hurting him rather than Jerry. It is worthy to note that Tom, who started out as a cat with normal feline intelligence, has changed dramatically over the years. Since his debut, Tom Cat has become almost completely bipedal, branching off from his quadrupedal nature to adopt an almost-human level of intelligence.

8. Jerry Mouse – Gerald “Jerry” Mouse makes up the other half of the dynamic duo, Tom & Jerry. The brown anthropomorphic mouse also made his first appearance in Puss Gets the Boot, where audiences knew him as simply, “the Mouse”. It was not until his next appearance in The Midnight Snack where he adopted the name Jerry. Jerry Mouse has walked on two legs since his debut, and made his last appearance in The Karate Guard, a 2005 Tom and Jerry cartoon produced and directed by Joseph Barbera before his death. The Karate Guard short remains the last theatrical cartoon to feature the famous cat-and-mouse duo.

10 Best Albums from the 90's

A while back we did a blog post entitled "10 Best Albums from the 90's". It is only fitting that a post dedicated to the best albums from the 90's is created as well. The 90's music scene shifted from the New Wave era into the grunge / post grunge era as bands like Nirvana, Stone Temple Pilots, and Bush ruled the radio. While the ten albums below might not all fall under your top 10 list, there is no arguing their popularity and their influence on modern music.

10. Live - Throwing Copper: Throwing Copper was the best "Nirvana influenced" album of the 90's. When listening to the current (horrible) albums that Live has released, it is surprising that they ever put a great album like this. Nevertheless, Throwing Copper is a great record that doesn't include a filler track.

Best Track: Lightning Crashes

9. Oasis - (What's the Story) Morning Glory: I've listened to "Definitely Maybe" nearly as much as this album and I think the Morning Glory is the better album tune for tune. Oasis is hardly originial or innovative, but they take the music of their influences (primarily The Beatles) and turn it into a flawless pop album. Every track on this album is ridiculously catchy from the opener "Hello" all the way to the closer "Champagne Supernova".

Best Track: Champagne Supernova

8. Red Hot Chili Peppers - Blood Sugar Sex Magik: The first four releases from the RHCP were all very good (with the exception of maybe their debut), but they really came into their own on Blood Sugar Sex Magik. This album might be very long, but it is always enjoyable throughout. No other band was playing music like the Chili Peppers at the time and Blood Sugar Sex Magik illustrates why they were one of the best of the 90's.

Best Track: Under the Bridge

7. Pearl Jam - Ten: There is no question that this is a great album, but what makes Ten even more impressive is that it was a debut album. Eddie Vedder did work on other projects prior to Pearl Jam (Temple of the Dog), but that doesn't take away from the fact that this album is incredibly impressive for a debut (or any album for that matter). Pearl Jam did release other great albums during their still ongoing career (Vitalogy, Vs, Yield), but none have come close to the nearly perfect Ten.

Best Track: Black

6. Smashing Pumpkins - Siamese Dream: I almost put "Mellon Collie" here instead. Even though "Mellon Collie" has some of my favorite Smashing Pumpkins tunes, the double album has too much filler to make the list. Siamese Dream, on the otherhand, is nearly a flawless album. Even though this piggy backed off of the success of Nirvana's Nevermind, it still had a huge influence on the post-grunce music scene.

Best Track: Today

5. Jimmy Eat World - Clarity: This is where all my credibility goes out the window right? For people who first heard Jimmy Eat World from the song "The Middle" (or future hits), you really need to give this release a listen. Clarity is completely different from the band's other releases. It is, without question, the best emo album of all time.

Best Track: Lucky Denver Mint

4. Sublime - Sublime: What's frustrating to me about this album (Sublime's best release) is that lead singer Bradley Nowell died shortly before it's release; never, in my opinion, reaching his peak as a songwriter. Nevertheless, this album is truly one of the best ones released during the 90s. No other band had mixed reggae, rock, pop, and alternative music nearly as well as Sublime did. This album (along with 40oz to Freedom to a lesser extent) helped to influence modern bands such as Pepper and Slightly Stoopid.

Best Track: April 29, 1992

3. Nirvana - Nevermind: Nevermind completely changed the face of music. Nobody was making music like "Smells Like Teen Spirit" and "Lithium" and if they were, it certainly wasn't ruling the radiospace like Nirvana's tunes were. This album is hyped a lot due to Kurt Cobain's death, the fact that it was "different" than other music at the time, and because of how many bands this album influenced. This album is one of the rare ones that is just as good as the hype and even after 18 years (can't believe it's been out this long), it still continues to have an impact on newer generations from their very first listen.

Best Track: Smells Like Teen Spirit

2. Radiohead - Ok Computer: Even with the brilliance of "The Bends", nobody anticipated a release quite like this from Radiohead. Every single track on this album (with maybe the exception of "Fitter Happier") illustrates why this band is in a league of their own. This album almost always appears in people's top 3 for best 90's albums and rightfully so.

Best Track: Paranoid Android

1. Green Day - Dookie: Many would argue that while this is certainly worthy of the "top 10", it should not be in the number 1 spot. Green Day's Dookie, however, has had just as much impact on modern music as Nirvana's Nevermind and Radiohead's Ok Computer. This album, in my opinion, is not only one of the best albums from the 90's, but also one of the best of all time. Every song on here is an instant punk classic. Bands throughout the 90's and the new millenium tried to replicate the success of Dookie, but none have even come close. Green Day continues to make great music, but none of their future releases could compare to that of Dookie.

Best Track: Longview

Top 10 Best Stupid Movies

A "best stupid" movie seems like a oxymoron, but when it comes to their films some people like nothing more than putting their brain on hiatus and enjoying a stupid comedy or an over the top action flick. Some movies that fall under these categories are just..well..plain stupid, but there have been a few that achieved "cult classic" status, ranking among the best stupid movies of all time.

10. Crank - Crank is the ultimate guy flick. This is the only film that I am aware of where a guy is getting head while in a high speed car cash while killing a bunch of a bad guys. Extremely badass. The movie is way over the top and the plot is a little dumb, but it's hard to take your eyes off the screen at all. Non stop action, sex, and badassness.

9.Bio-Dome - Metacritic voted Biodome as the"worst movie of all time" (http://www.metacritic.com/film/lowscores.shtml ). It's a Pauly Shore flick which will tell you right off the bat that this is a stupid film. Basically two stoners wonder into a "bio-dome" thinking it's a mall. The "bio-dome" closes shut and now five scientists have to deal with Pauly Shore and Stephen Baldwin for an entire year. It's a bad movie, but at the same time has a lot of laughs if you fall into the right demographic.

8.The Fast and the Furious - This movie built a huge cult following after it's initial release. This is the ultimate movie for your "meathead, fist pumping" demographic. There are fast cars (lots of them), hot chicks (Michelle Rordiguez and Jordana Brewster), Vin Diesel, and a lot of non-stop action all the while not being too heavy on delivering a great plot. It's not a great movie by any means, but it is entertaining and certainly a good way to kill a couple of hours.

7. History of the World: Part 1 - One of the original spoof movies is also one of the best. This is my favorite movie that Mel Brooks put out, but it still constitues as a "stupid movie" (as does most spoof movies).

6. Airplane - Loved this movie despite how stupid a lot of the humor is. This has become a cult classic and still appeals to new generations of movie goers.

5. Dumb and Dumber - One of the original Jim Carrey movies is also one of his funniest. Dumb and Dumber is the story of two losers, Harry and Lloyd, who go on a mission to return a lady's (who Lloyd drove to the airport) briefcase. They are unaware, however, that the suitcase contains ransom money for the lady's husband. Hilarity ensues. You know with a title like "Dumb and Dumber" that you are not going to get an Oscar worthy movie, but this movie is still hysterical (as with the other movies..you need to have a certain sense of humor).

4. Troll 2 - "They're eating her. Then they're going to eat me. Oh my gooooooood." This is one of the lines from Troll 2, the worst horror movie ever made. You can view the aformentioned scene here (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HyophYBP_w4). This movie is the opposite of scary, the acting is beyond horrible, the plot is all over the place and makes no sense, but you want to watch it again and again because of how entertainingly bad it is. Troll 2 apparently is supposed to be the sequel to the originial Troll movie, although each movie has nothing to do with each other.

3. The Room - For those of you who have never heard of "The Room", check out this trailer (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yCj8sPCWfUw). Yup, this is a real movie. This is, in fact, considered one of the worst movies ever made. After seeing it a few times, I'd have to agree. The acting is atrocious, the plot is horrible, the music is lame..everything about the movie just plain sucks. However, everything is SO bad that it's downright hilarious. It's one of the movies that you laugh at..not with. This has grown so popular over the past couple of years, that they now have monthly screenings of it in LA and have brought it into New York (all shows are usually sold out). David Cross and Jonah Hill also consider it one of their favorite movies. I don't want to give too much away. You really just need to see this movie to see why this ranks as one of the best stupid movies of all time.

2. Billy Madison - I think I've seen this movie over a thousand times. I'm not kidding. Every time it's on TV (even TBS where they block some stuff out) I HAVE to watch it. I don't really need to go over the plot because if you're a fan of "stupid movies" you no doubt have seen this at least twice (and if you haven't..shame on you). Even after seeing it more times than I can count, it makes me laugh everytime I watch it. The whole story is absurd..it definitely constitutes as a bad movie, but it's easily one of the best bad movies out there.

1. Wet Hot American Summer - People will no doubt have mixed feelings about this being on the list (and in the number 1 spot). Some people will argue that this doesn't count as a "stupid movie", while most others will have no idea what this movie even is. This is one of my favorite movies of all time, but it's really hard to argue that it is not a really stupid movie. Wet Hot American Summer takes place during the last day of a sleepaway camp. That's really the entire plot, but I laugh during pretty much every scene of this movie EVERY time I watch it. For those of you who do not think this is a "stupid movie" take a closer look at some of the scenes that take place. There's a talking can of beans who "sucks his own dick..a lot", a scene where most of the camp staff goes into town and robs an old lady to shoot up some heroin..and then are fine 5 minutes later, and a random Kenyan marathon runner who interupts a capture the flag game. Not to mention a cook who humps fridges, fondles his sweater, owns a bottle of dick cream, and smears mud on his ass. This might be always my favorite stupid movie.

Top 20 Television Shows from the Past 20 Years

The list below is a look at the top 20 television shows of the past 20 years. In order to qualify for the list, each show much have debuted in 1989 or later. Video clips included.

20. The Tom Green Show

The Tom Green show was a highly unique and often hilarious concept. The way he interacted with the public was seldom seen elsewhere on television. Although rumors circulated that a Hitler sketch he did caused him to be taken off the air, I believe it was due to the massive success his show had experienced. He was too recognizable to pull off the great skits that he did after his two first seasons in the states. The clip below is my favorite Tom Green skit.

19. Cops

You might be wondering how this could make the list, but you know you love this show. Nothing probably makes you happier than watching a routine pull over turn into an arrest for crack possession. This is white trash TV at it's best.

18. Da Ali G Show

A very underrated show on HBO. This did not receive the recognition that it deserved until the (amazing) Borat movie was released. All three characters were great (Ali G, Borat, and Bruno). The awkwardness that his interviewees went through made for some frequently hilarious moments.

17. The Daily Show

One of the most important television shows to come out of Comedy Central. This show got a whole generation into of television viewers interested in politics. The show started with Craig Kilborn, but Jon Stewart made it into the show that is today.

16. Dexter

The best show Showtime ever produced. Dexter follows the life of a blood splatter analyst who happens to be vigilante serial killer. The show is EXTREMELY entertaining and unlike anything else you've ever seen on television.

15. Buffy the Vampire Slayer

This show was on the air when I was thirteen years old so part of the reason it makes the top 20 is my infatuation with Sarah Michelle Gellar back then. Even without my middle school crush, this show remained an interesting television series. All of the characters were highly likable and the plot was entertaining enough to keep you coming back episode after episode.

14. The Office

Critics said a US version of the hit British show "The Office" would never succeed. Nobody anticipated the United States version would be as good as it is. The acting is first rate, each one being cast PERFECTLY. Few shows match the comedic brilliance of The Office.

13. Boy Meets World

If you are over the age of 25 you will probably complain that this on the list. Even if you are under 25, you still might complain, but this was show was absolutely hilarious. It did lose some steam in its last two seasons, and the first season was a little weak, but everywhere in between was highly entertaining and often hilarious.

12. Full House

Another one you might groan at. It was extremely corny, but it was impossible to dislike Full House. The situations were relatable and the plots (although sometimes cheesy) were realistic, exploring real life family issues. If you're from the 20-26 age group you should agree with the inclusion of this show.

11. Robot Chicken

A show truly made for the ADD demographic. Robot Chicken is a 10 minute show that includes various short comedic clips ranging from 2 seconds to sometimes 2-3 minutes. 90% of the time they hit the mark and when they don't it is only because I am unfamiliar with the television show or movie that they are mocking.

10. Doug

I needed to include a Nickelodeon show in the mix. Doug stands out as the best nicktoon of the 90s. Yes it was stupid, just like most other Nickelodeon nicktoons back then, but it was so stupid it was awesome. The clip below confirms this.

9. South Park

Who knew that after it's premiere 10 years ago, South Park would turn into one of the biggest animated series on television. South Park is not only consistently hilarious, but it is extremely intelligent often integrating the writers' own views on current events within each episode. I personally think it has jumped the shark this year, but nothing on television beats a Butters / Cartman episode or an awkward Randy Marsh moment.

8. Arrested Development

This was the smartest comedy in the history of television, which is what led to its failure. It was honestly too brilliant for its own good. The show follows a dysfunctional family who falls into a lot of trouble when the father, and head of the family company, is arrested. Michael, the only stable character, takes over the company and tries everything he can to keep his family together. EVERY character on this show contributed to its success. Gob and Tobias would have to be my two favorites thought.

7. Scrubs

People either love or hate this show. Obviously because it made my top 20, it is a show that I absolutely love. What's great about this show are the characters themselves. The show did a great job with character development and with casting. Scrubs also contains hundreds of great one-liners.

6. Oz

A brutal look into life within a maximum security prison. Oz was one of the best television shows to come out of HBO. It honestly felt like the perfect soap opera for men.

5. The Sopranos

Tied with Oz, in my opinion, for the best HBO show ever made. In terms of mobster-based entertainment, this series rivals The Godfather. The ending was highly controversial (I personally did not like it), but it still does not take away from the brilliance of this show.

4. Lost

The most frustratingly addictive show on television. Lost will answer one question while asking five others all in one episode. The true greatness of this show lies in how it is going to end, but for now it stands as one of the best television shows of the past twenty years.

3. Family Guy

Could not believe when this show was first canceled. I can't get through an entire episode without laughing at least ten times. The flashbacks that are often mocked are extremely random and often make no sense, but that nonsense is what makes the show so hilarious. Favorite moments have to be when the whole family gains up on Meg.

2. Seinfeld

It's sad to say that there will never be a show quite like this. It was a show about nothing, but it had more laugh out loud moments in one episode than most shows managed in an entire series. Nothing beats the Costanzas for comedic gold.

1. The Simpsons

Most people would have this and Seinfeld switched around, but my favorite show of the past twenty years would definitely have to be the Simpsons. There is a reason why this is the longest animated television show in history. The Simpsons paved the way for shows like Family Guy and South Park. Recent output has failed to live up to the greatness of the past, but even the new episodes are a lot better than 90% of everything else out there.

The Most Anticipated Las Vegas Events of April, 2009

There's never a shortage of things to do in Las Vegas. April is no exception, with a number of highly coveted events covering a gamut of entertainment options. Below are a few events that topped our list for April.

Earth Weekend – April 17^th-19^th

N9NE Group presents Earth Weekend - Benefiting Conservation International. This 3-day event showcases N9NE Group's Path for a Sustainable Future. Starting Friday at noon at the Palms Pool and Bungalows, be the first to see Vegas' first solar powered DJ booth and its first veggie oil bus. Catch an eye-opening "earthy" movie at 7PM each night. And then dance the night away at three different venues including Ghostbar, Rain Nightclub and Moon Nightclub. Enjoy one Earth Weekend event, or all three days. For tickets and more information visit

http://n9negroup.com/#/pool/calendar/?loadThisEvent=2009,4,17.

Elton John: The Red Piano – April 18^th, 19^th, 21^st, 22^nd - 7:30 PM

Elton John is well known for really "putting on a show." What better place to showcase his talents than on the Las Vegas strip? Catch the show of a lifetime at Caesars Palace as Elton John and his red piano take center stage. Of course there's no telling what songs he'll perform but no doubt you'll hear at least one classic like "Rocket Man," "Candle in the Wind" or "Benny and the Jets." Tickets start at $94.05 and can be purchased through ticketmaster.com as well as a number of other ticket selling outlets.

Indoor Nationals – April 16^th -19^th - 9 AM – 5 PM

Be a part of the action as you watch the best amateur and semi-professional indoor soccer players battle for the tournament champion crown. Las Vegas Indoor Soccer is hosting the USA Indoor nationals that will feature more than 50 teams nationwide competing in four adult divisions. Tournament viewing is open to the public and complimentary. For more information, contact Las Vegas Sports Park at (702)233-3600, or visit lvsportspark.com.

Rehab Pool Party – Starts April 19^th - 11:00AM – 7:00 PM

This world famous Sunday pool party is back, starting its new season with special guest Snoop Dogg. Spend the day frolicking among thousands of pool party enthusiasts. Dive into the fun. Rent a cabana, hang on a day bed, sip Rock Star Lemonades and dance to the beat of world famous DJ spins. It's all happening every Sunday starting April 19th at the Hard Rock Hotel and Casino. For Information and reservations for the Rehab Pool Party call (702)693-5555.

Five Star World Poker Classic WPT – April 18^th–25^th

The Bellagio in Las Vegas will be the hot spot this year for The World Poker Tour (WPT) Championship. Fox Sports has been televising the entire season which will culminate with this final poker battle. This $25,000 buy-in no-limit hold'em event will include all the winners of the previous WPT main events as well as many other poker pros and new hopefuls. There are some optimum viewing opportunities on the Bellagio casino floor. For full information call the Bellagio at (888)987-6667.

2009 Epicurean Affair - Thursday April 23^rd - 7PM

Enjoy rare and unique wines, along with food delicacies you've never tried before at the 19^th annual Epicurean Affair. Considered the city's culinary event of the year, The Flamingo Las Vegas will be hosting this unforgettable evening for the fourth consecutive year. Set poolside in Flamingo's 15-acre tropical oasis, your evening will be filled with outstanding libations and tantalizing gastro delights created by world-renowned chefs from Las Vegas' finest restaurants. To purchase tickets call the Flamingo Box Office at (702)733-3333 or visit www.flamingolasvegas.com or www.vegas.com.

Paul Oakenfold Presents PERFECTO Las Vegas – April 25^th – 10 PM–4 AM

PERFECTO was named after Paul Oakenfold's record label and conceptualized specifically for Rain Nightclub. An internationally-acclaimed DJ, Paul Oakenfold has been touted as one of the world's leading DJ/re-mixers and will be showing his stuff at the legendary Rain Nightclub. To see why CNN, Rolling Stone, BPM, Remix and so many other people in the music industry think Paul Oakenfold is the best, order tickets at RAIN VIP Package: PERFECTO Vegas ft Paul Oakenfold @ Rain | Las Vegas, NV .

Goodlife Sundays – Every Sunday 10 PM–4 AM

If you're looking for the goodlife, head over to Moon. Immerse yourself in an amazing nightlife culture that has a vibe all its own. Get ready to dance to the world's freshest sounds In Las Vegas' only retractable roof penthouse club. Goodlife Sunday's at Moon are a great way to end a weekend, or begin an entirely new week of Vegas fun. For information and reservations visit http://n9negroup.com/#/moon/main/.

Las Vegas City of Lights Jazz and R&B Festival - April 25^th

The 17^th Annual Las Vegas City of Lights Jazz and R&B Festival will take place at Government Amphitheater featuring the performances of handpicked musicians throughout the day and into the night. Jazz artists slated to perform include bass guitarist Wayman Risdale, pop, jazz and funk vocalist Maysa, and the sax sounds of Marion Meadows and Jessy J. Pack a picnic and enjoy the sweet sounds of jazz. For more information and to order tickets visit http://www.yourjazz.com.

8 Year Anniversary of Soundbar - Featuring Doc Martin – April 30^th - 10 PM

Eight years ago Soundbar was created by a small crew of DJs determined to develop the first event solely dedicated to the sounds of deep house music. On April 30^th, Master DJ Doc Martin will help celebrate this entertainment breakthrough at Ghostbar, on top of the Palms Casino Resort. Doc Martin is the DJ known as a master of mixing the crowd with the music. His legendary sets mix everything from deep house, acid, funk, tribal and classics that get the crowd dancing and partying all through the night. For more information and tickets for this 8 year anniversary event featuring Doc Martin visit http://n9negroup.com/#/ghostbar/main/.

Top 10 Most Underrated Television Shows

Certain television shows such as The Simpsons, Lost, and 24 have received the recognition that they deserve. The fact that they are enormously entertaining have made them as popular as they are today. However, there are dozens of television shows that are just as good (some can argue even better), but for one reason or another never receive the fan base of the aforementioned tv shows. Here is a list of the top 10 most underrated television shows (must have aired in 2000 or later to qualify).


1. Supernatural - Anybody who has seen an episode of the brilliant Supernatural can vouch for the number 1 spot that it has received. Any fan of the horror/suspense genre must see this show. Two brothers's mother was murdered in front of their father by something "supernatural". This caused the father to take an interest in the supernatural, raising the boys as warriors to fight the unknown. When the brothers grow up, the father disappears on a routine supernatural hunt. The brothers go on a search for their missing father. This highly addictive show is not only entertaining, scary, and intelligent, but the character development is practically unrivaled amongst other shows that exist.


2. Robot Chicken - The show is starting to receive the recognition that it deserves after the popularity of the Star Wars episode, but I still think it is highly underrated. This 10 minute claymation show has brief clips (lasting anywhere from 2 seconds to 2 minutes) that pretty much mock everything possible. 90% of the time, the jokes work and the briefness of it all is perfect for the ADD generation. Sometimes you won't get the jokes (when it refers to a TV show/movie you haven't seen), but when it's on you'll laugh until it hurts.

3. Dexter - Dexter remains an underrated show because of its placement on Showtime. Had it been aired on HBO, the popularity of this show would grow tremendously. Dexter has one of the most unique plots that currently exists on television. Dexter is an employee of the Miami Metropolitan Police Department's crime lab. When you see him interact with other coworkers, he seems like your every day typical guy. Dexter is far from it however. He is a vigilante. When he is on the crime scene for a brutal murder he decides to extract his own brand of justice by solving the crime himself and killing the murderers. Dexter is original, addictive, and entertaining. You really will never see a show quite like this.

4. Morel Orel - Morel Orel's 3 year run unfortunately just ended on December 18th . Morel Orel is the second best Adult Swim original show behind Robot Chicken. Orel is a well-behaved Christian child who seeks to better himself and his community on a daily basis by following the teachings of the church. The humor aspect of this show lies among Orel's interpretation of each sermon. Example: a teaching stated that you must be loyal to your friends. Orel is introduced to a new "friend" who happens to be a bad kid. He ends up beating up other kids and destroying property because he was simply following the church teachings. The dad is also a great part of this show. Hes an alcoholic who is battling his own inner demons. Very sad to see this show go.

5. Jericho - There's a reason why CBS received a substantial amount of people protesting the cancellation of this show. The show focuses on residents of Jericho, Kansas in the aftermath of nuclear attacks. This is a highly entertaining show that always leaves you wondering "whats going to happen next". Similar in what makes Lost so entertaining, except not as frustrating.

6. Oz - Due to the popularity of the Sopranos and Six Feet Under, Oz was highly overlooked show that was actually just as good as the Sopranos and better than Six Feet Under. Oz takes a look at prison life in the maximum security prison known as Oswald. Oz refers to a unit within Oswald that is known for it's "leniency" compared to the other units. This show doesn't hold back in it's depiction of prison life which provides an authentic feel to the show that is rarely seen. Everything about it feels so real and you actually sympathize with half of the prisoners while hating the other half. It's hard to imagine a show like Oz ever existing again.

7. It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia - Any fan of improvisational comedy should check out It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. Boasting Danny Devito among it's lead actors, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia provides a humorous look at an extremely dysfunctional family.

8. Arrested Development - Here comes the boos. Not because it doesn't deserve to be on the list, but because it's ranked "8" instead of "1" or "2". Arrested Development is often looked at as the funniest show that ever existed on television, or one of them. In my opinion, this show is slightly overrated in that sense, but extremely underrated in terms of how unpopular this show was when it was aired. You need to have a certain sense of humor to appreciate this show. Those who fit the target audience, will no doubt be one of the many who are still pissed off to this day that this show was canceled.

9. MXC - MXC can only be described as stupidally brilliant. This show is an actual Japanese game show that is dubbed in English (although not accurately). MXC highlights the ridiculousness of some Japanese shows in an extremely amusing manner.

10. Everybody Hates Chris - Critics love it, viewers love it...so what's the problem? Not sure, but for one reason or another this show never received the fanbase that it deserved. A very funny show nonetheless.

Top 10 New Websites of 2008

Each year millions of new websites are created, but only a few actually succeed. The reason for their success usually is related to a variety of factors including: offering a unique(s) feature that can't be found elsewhere, providing interesting content, and having a good marketing strategy in place. These new websites, the best ones of 2008, have successfully broken through the clutter of other sites by offering unique and interesting content.

1. BreakingNews.com - The BreakingNews.com website does exactly as you would expect it to, provide the most up to date News stories from around the world. Because it provides feeds from various reliable Internet sources, it offers an unbiased approach to the News, which is something seldom seen on the web. BreakingNews.com offers "breaking news alerts" in a variety of categories, including "world", "US", "politics", "entertainment", "sports", "business & tech", "health & science", and "odds & animals". A unique feature about this website is that it allows you to sort your category preference simply by clicking on an up arrow or down arrow. If that's not enough, BreakingNews.com features a "water cooler" section that allows visitors to see which stories people are receiving the most attention.

2. findingDulcinea.com - Technically formed at the end of 2007, findingDulcinea.com was not released from Beta mode until early 2008 (therefore allowing it to qualify for the top 10 list). Boasting a creative tagline of "Librarian of the Internet", fidningDulcinea.com more than lives up to its claim. Whether you're looking for general information (on pretty much anything), a directory of websites, or top new stories, you will be able to find it on this website. My favorite part about findingDulcinea.com is how it encompasses all the best characteristics of the Internet. It is informative, human-generated, as well as additively entertaining. There is a "Web Guide" section which provides an extensive overview on a variety of topics (including links to reliable sources), "Beyond the Headlines" which offers a unique viewpoint of the top stories of the day (as well as links to the outside sources), and "Netcetera" which has offbeat, original content (i.e. notable figures birthdays, essential websites for New Years, etc.).

3. SpliceToday.com - Refreshing, entertaining, informative, and unique are all words that can be used to describe SpliceToday. SpliceToday.com produces unique stories about a variety of topics including sex, sports, politics, music, pop culture, and more. I've been a fan of this website since June and have been addicted ever since. Just read any of the articles on the website and you'll grasp what I'm referring to.

4. Yahoo! Buzz - If you're a social media nerd like myself, you were eagerly waiting for the launch of this website. Being that it is controlled by Yahoo, a high expectation level was set for this website. So far it has been meeting these expectations. While it offers a very similar approach as Digg and Propeller, I've seen a significantly less amount of spam than on Yahoo! Buzz which is a huge reason why it gets my vote. I can only see this website getting better over time.

5. AnswersTV - AnswersTV provides a concept that makes you wonder why no other website has thought of it. To put it simply, AnswersTV is a website that has a bunch of informational videos relating to a variety of topics (Magic, Travel, Health, Food, etc.). Think of these videos as a cross between "how to" videos and if Wikipedia converted it's pages into videos. The content that AnswersTV.com provides is unique, interesting, and most importantly, informative.


6. Who's Your Champion - Check out their "Wall of Champions" and you'll grasp what exactly Who's Your Champion is all about. From the typical (Chuck Norris, Arnold Schwarzenegger) to the wtfs?? (2 men creating a "Let's Put the Fork in the Garbage Disposal" dance, nerdy fat kids awkwardly singing), Who's Your Champion allows you to upload videos of pretty much anyone that makes you go "wow that person is a champ" while voting for other people's videos as well. This is such a refreshingly unique type of social media website that I can see sky rocketing in popularity in the near future.

7. AlcoholAbuse.com - Why does this make the list you might ask? Well, from what I've seen this new website has the most relevant information pertaining to alcohol abuse from symptoms, treatments, and general information. This website even includes an alcoholism test that allows you to assess whether you have a problem or not. This is such a prevalent problem that exists (we all know at least one person who suffers from this) that it makes this website very important, thus ranking on the top 10 list.

8. Smilebooks - The only product that makes the Top 10 list. Smilebooks allows you to create a digital photobook (a pretty kickass looking one if I might add) of pretty much anything that you want. Ranging from weddings, graduations, vacations, baby showers, etc. Smilebooks has a variety of different themes/categories to choose from.


9. JuicyCampus - Go to college? Have something juicy to say about somebody? Or maybe you just want to bash somebody, anonymously. Well you can with JuicyCampus.com. What surprises me the most about this website is that it doesn't require a user name or registration, but yet the spamming is kept under control. If you go to college, it's cool to see what is being said about your campus and the people who go there.

10. MakeupProducts.com - My last girlfriend was a fan of this website, and I can see why. Although this definitely is targeting women more than men, guys can still find it useful when searching for a gift for that special lady. This website includes hundreds of different makeup product reviews, tips and tricks, as well as industry news and overviews of different brands.

The 10 Most Hilariously Offensive South Park Moments

South Park, one of the funniest shows in the history of television, is known to push the envelope no matter what topic they are discussing. You can't sit through an episode for more than five minutes without witnessing something that is hilariously offensive. Every once in a while, there will be a moment that is so "over the top" that it will shock even the most hardcore South Park fan (in a good way). Below are the ten most hilariously offensive South Park moments.

10. Tom Cruise - Trapped in the Closet: A favorite by many, this episode hilariously makes fun of Scientology, Tom Cruise's gayness, and R. Kelly's violent nature. Instead of just selecting one scene from this episode, I'm going to include the entire episode.

9. Cripple Fight: Move over Timmy, there is a new cripple in town and he can do a lot more than just say his name. Timmy becomes enraged with jealousy because everybody thinks Jimmy is a much cooler handicapped person than Timmy. Eventually Timmy has enough and they both throw down in a parking lot for a good 5 minutes while a crowd of hundreds of bystanders watch.

8. Cartman Gives Kyle AIDS: Cartman gets AIDS due to a botched blood transfusion from a tonsillectomy (don't worry, the doctor gives him free ice cream for it). Kyle finds this very funny (in an ironic way) and frequently laughs about this. Cartman has had enough, so he ends up injecting Kyle with his AIDS. Kyle tells the principal about this, only to be told "not to be a tattle tale".

7. Cartman has Tourette's: Cartman fakes having tourette's syndrome so he can whatever he wants. Need I say more? Cartman uses this to his full advantage by saying all the most offensive things he can think of.

6. Butter Gets a Surprise in his Mouth: Cartman keeps inviting Butters over for a sleepover. Not because he likes him, but because he keeps taking pictures of Butters is in very awkward positions (one has Butters with a tampon in his mouth). Cartman takes a picture of Butters' penis in is mouth. When the boys tell Cartman that doing this makes Cartman the gay one, he freaks out and (because of Kyle's suggestion) invites Butters over to "reverse the gay polarity" by sticking his penis in Butters' mouth. He tells Butters he has a surprise, blind folds him, and just before anything happens Butters Dad walks in and witnesses everything. Because of this, Butters gets shipped off to a Christian retreat to turn him straight because (according to his father) he is "bi-curious".

5. Kyle's Cousin Kyle's Jewishness: This isn't so much as offensive as it is hilarious. Kyle's cousin Kyle was the best non-main character on South Park (I wish he was used more often than just two episodes). He takes pretty much every Jewish stereotype imaginable and brings it to the forefront. This ranges from his voice, his lack of athleticism, his dream to become an investment banker, his constant complaining, and his frugality.

4. The Death of Strawberry Shortcake: All of the Imaginationland episodes were easily the weirdest in the South Park catalog. One scene that stands out for its offensiveness and hilarity is the death of Strawberry Shortcake. The evil imaginary characters have her tied up and pluck out one of her eyes. The woodland critters don't think this is evil enough so they decide that her dying by having somebody pee in her with AIDS would do the trick. Later on in the episode Stan mentions that all he sees is Strawberry Shortcake dead with pee in her eye.

3. Eric Cartman Gets Sexually Excited Over Butters Getting Beaten by his Parents: Butters is grounded (as usual), but he needs to leave his house for a scheme that the boys have came up with to make money. Cartman tells Butters he will stay home and pretend to be him when his Dad calls in to check on him. Cartman takes advantage of this opportunity and when Butters' Dad calls in, he is overly offensive towards him and ends up calling him a pussy. He follows this trend when the Mother calls in as well. Butter gets back in time, Cartman leaves and sets up a lawn chair in front of the house, and when Butters parents arive home Butter happily exclaims "Hi Mom and Dad!". Butter's Dad responds with a "Don't you hi Dad me!" and proceeds to beat him. Cartman enjoys this tremendously and mentions his sexual excitement over this.

2. Scott Tenorman Eats his Parents: This was easily the most evil thing Eric Cartman has ever done. In my opinion, this was the best overall episode of South Park. Cartman hates Scott Tenorman because of all the tricks he plays on Cartman. Cartman tries to seek revenge multiple times with very little success. How does he finally do the trick? He gets Scott's parents killed by luring them into a crazy farmer's property (where he shoots them for trespassing). Cartman takes the bodies, chops them up, and puts them into a chili. He then hosts a Chili Con Carnival where he ends up feeding Scott the chili and makes him eat his parents. Scott starts to cry, Radiohead (his favorite band) comes to the carnival, sees him cry and calls him a cry baby repeatedly. Cartman takes pleasure in this and starts drinking his tears. Messed up, but very funny.

1. Randy Marsh's Wrong Answer on Wheel of Fortune: This was the most brilliant opening scene in South Park history. The producers were smart in not giving away any part of this episode in the previews. Randy Marsh is in the final round of Wheel of Fortune. The category is "people who annoy you". It is seven letters long and after receiving the letters "r", "s", "t", "l", and "e", it is spelt out _ _ _ _ E R S. Randy guesses B, G, N, and an "O" to reveal N _ G G E R S. The audience looks on with blank faces as the black cameraman has an angry look on his face. Randy becomes nervous and starts to say how he knows the answer, but shouldn't say it. Eventually, with time running out, he exclaims eagerly in anticipation of winning a lot of money "NIGGERS!". Time runs out, Vanna (looking very ashamed) walks over to the puzzle to reveal that the answer was actually naggers. Extremely funny and genius opening scene to a great South Park episode.